fluent

"The problems we experience in our lives and in the world (whether relationship issues or world hunger) stem from energetic weakness and disconnection, from our lack of capacity to feel ourselves, each other, the earth, and how life seeks to move and evolve through us.  The issue is not whether or not to act and “do something,” but what actually prompts us to act.  Most human beings’ actions are currently prompted by a desire to control the outer world as a way of coping with their lack of capacity to connect with their inner feelings and experience in relationship to the problem.  Our actions are always an organic-by product of how we feel inside, and lack of inner connectedness will yield disconnected actions."
Dan Emmons
excerpt from this interview

"What you can plan is too small for you to live.
What you can live wholeheartedly will make plans enough
for the vitality hidden in your sleep."

David Whyte, excerpt from "What To Remember When Waking"

I am tired of trying to figure out ‘the best’ for myself and for the World. It’s exhausting and, let’s face it, actually not possible.
yes, well intended but this attitude is a little arrogant and ignorant too. 
no, really, I don't think I can save the world.
nothing needs to be saved.
but everything needs to be seen, witnessed, felt,
expressed, at least to some degree,
communed with,
grieved for, celebrated. 

This year I turned my gaze and attention within and allowed time/space to feel and as I deepened this practice of witnessing one's Self, I felt less need to control/intervene/manipulate externally. The practice of witnessing one's Self extended inevitably to witnessing the Other & the World. 

I am not referring to absolute idleness but really marrying 'being' and 'doing'.
Not re-acting from unintegrated emotions (fear, anger, grief), an unconscious need of control and rejecting parts of myself but rather acting from deep awareness and being moved by the life force, organically, authentically, in an embodied way - feeling and knowing from my body.

what could that look like? I can assure you much less 'doing' out in the world but also keen, fierce action within, like facing demons, romancing one's shadow, welcoming priorly rejected parts of one's Self, and feeling. For us, the modern humans, this is a HUGE (and dangerous) work already which would require a lot of attention (and time) to be directed inward
which we are conditioned to easily spill outward. 

This year I took a break from my outward oriented actions, especially those intended to serve the collective and shift the collective consciousness; I actually had to because I had no energy to cast out. The exhaustion of moving around the world for 6 years and gazing externally made sure that I'd stay put, slow down and focus on this very being closest to me: I called it "Zone Zero". 

I found out that Zone Zero - the very center of my being, my life, mein lebensmittelpunkt - is indeed very rich, fertile, full of surprises and yet quite demanding and challenging. It requires stamina, commitment and faith to attend. There's a lot of wisdom hidden there through which I can tap into a universal stream of archetypal knowing. Some of the rewards of visiting and dwelling often in Zone Zero are Presence, clarity, humility, self-care and compassion. 

I finally know, with much humility, Life designs “intelligently”, much more intelligently that I can ever even imagine. (May I never forget this!)

Now I rather give my attention to allowing ‘the best’ of what Life has in mind & heart to be revealed - for me and for the whole -, I focus on receiving and joining ‘what wants to happen’ rather than making happen what I think/imagine, even feel is the best. 
My prayer is to be fluent in the language of life and be fully present in its unfolding. 

I would love to live
Like a river flows,
Carried by the surprise
Of its own unfolding.

John O'Donohue



Witnessing is an act of courage, an unfailing medicine and an enormous gift one can offer to one's Self and to another. Opening a quiet and intimate time/space in the noise and dust of Life where intuition and insight, compassion and self-love can be present. a welcoming of Life's gifts in every shape and form and recognizing our heart's longing to join the life force animating us. I offer Presence Sessions to be with you, listen to you and witness you as you reveal to yourself the mystery that is calling you.